Well of course, I want good looking babies and tall kids, so I am quite.. superficial in that sense. Everyone wants to be with someone they are attracted to but I don't love my wife because she's cute. I don't think that is shallow, you want to make sure your offspring have traits that are beneficial. If she isn't pretty enough to make babies with or bang, she's not going to register on my radar to date. But men were only marginally better. Do Looks Matter To Men In Dating And Relationships. Being the giver in a codependent relationship can also satisfy needs such as the need to matter to someone, the need to feel competent, the need to feel close to someone,” she says. If she hits that baseline, everything after that is nice, but really not priority/necessary. We clearly live in a society of appearances, where being young and pretty is still one of the main goals in life for many people, but do they actually matter in the long run? Also being a relationship kind of makes you more desirable (if you are a woman) and with more social skills (if you are a man) generally. As mentioned, finding someone physically attractiveisn’t the only reason for sexual interest. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. They matter a huge amount. It's like a wheel on a car. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Its stupid but it is true. But there is no getting around the fact that sexual interest starts with finding someone attractive physically. Communication: You and your partner can share your feelings, even when you don’t agree, in a way that makes the other person feel safe, heard, and not judged. It's not enough by itself but without it the car is not going anywhere. Generally when people look at you they look at your relationship status, its like the most important thing in a status. I think a better phrase would be "looks don't matter as long as you're attracted to them" or "looks don't matter if they have an unattractive personality." My point here isn’t to say that you need to look good to get girls. Just need to look decent, the rest is personality. For me it's not so much a matter of degrees of hotness or cuteness or beauty, just whether or not I find them attractive (at least when it comes to me being romantically interested). "When you really respect the person you’re with, your future is clear," Masini says. But appearance and attraction are different to everyone. What assurance you have that 1 year down the road the hot girl becomes ugly? I know that the average age in this sub is very young, but even given that, there is a ridiculous frequency with which commentors are confusing "looks" and "sexual attraction". We can be reasonably sure that while looks are significant in a relationship but they are not the most important thing, especially in a long-term relationship. So looks matter only in the initial phases of a relationship, but as it progresses, other factors come into play. Harder to judge about this, but I'm awkward and weird as hell, so having the ability to deal with my logic/mindset would be pretty sweet too! My ex, I sometimes didn't want sex, and sometimes I thought about other girls we did it. If you can't stand being seen with someone that you consider unattractive, then dating someone with looks that you don't approve of isn't necessarily much better than dating someone that's gorgeous but incompatible. I agree that looks should not matter, and a person’s character should be measured by what they do, not what they look like. For women, most certainly. We seek posts from users who have specific and personal relationship quandaries that other redditors can help them try to solve. Not being in shape doesn’t mean you can’t get girls. Also probably more common that, if you have a good looking gf, you would want sex more too right? Do looks matter? The initial spark sure, we can all agree on that, but in the long run? Romantic relationships can be a lot of fun! Relationships are not usually smooth sailing, no matter how much we care about the people that we date. Just don't be an asshole about it. I think there has to be some level of physical attraction, but having a good personality and intelligence is most important. Sex The Secret Reason Why Sex Is So Crucial in Relationships New research on sex in relationships shows the real reason it can benefit yours. Posted Jul 04, 2017 What would you do at that point? Dating someone for their looks can end badly, so looks arent important at all. Beauty changes and fades with time, if a relationship is based solely on how appealing your partner looks it is bound to be temporary. If yes, then everything else comes into play (personality, personal chemistry, intelligence, humor, ect). If you're in an unequal relationship, that won't ever matter because your partner will never be wrong. I think looks are not everything, if you have feelings for that girl you should be with her, it doesnt matter if shes not the pretties girl out there. Please keep in mind that the OP of this thread has chosen to mark this post with the [Serious] replies only tag, therefore any replies that are jokes, puns, off-topic, or are otherwise non-contributory will be removed. Physical attraction is very important to me but it's more of a threshold than a strict hierarchy. Covert Narcissist Signs You are Dealing with a Master Manipulator/Lisa A Romano Podcast - Duration: 26:01. A stable relationship often involves planning a future, whatever that looks like: renting together, buying a house, owning cars, having kids, taking lots of vacations. Well, to put it nicely, no. If you asked me Do looks matter in a relationship, I would Say attraction is a heuristic, not an algorithm; everyone has their own recipe of what is beautiful and what’s sublime, but assign different weights for each of the categories! If she burned her face off tomorrow she would still be the same person. Being attracted to someone sexually happens for a variety of reasons. That doesn't mean you have to be the hottest girl I know. Plenty of guys have found happiness in their dating lives despite their appearance; a handful even lead playboy lifestyles despite being completely out of shape. Character traits like that are attractive in themselves. Tumblr. Press J to jump to the feed. Sup guys, you can use my code "SSS30" to get 30% OFF (just $10!) 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